Sunday, April 3, 2011

先不論清水鏹水,但凡女人,都是水做的。水做的,就會有眼淚。

流淚是一件很私密的事情--笑,我們會跟別人同歡;流淚時,我們卻羞於讓人看見。要知道你跟某個人的交情如何,就看他想大哭的時候,會不會想起你。

有些人會在淋浴時或被窩裡流淚,但這種刻意安排對我是不管用的,因為我需要勾起一些情緒,所以通常在看電影、看書和獨自搭車聽歌的時間,才會流得出眼淚。在戲院時可以哭得痛快些;在車上就盡量找個死角,把眼淚留在眼眶內。

女人比男人多話,淚也流得比男人隨性。我就沒見過半個男人(清醒地)在公眾地方痛哭,但就目擊過至少兩個女人在街頭流淚。一次是在深宵回家的路上,一個女孩以長髮掩面,坐在路邊的長椅上,嚶嚶啜泣;另一次是在酒店擦身而過,哭聲環迴長廊,如影如魅。女人沉醉在自製的悲情之中,在外人看來,那畫面其實挺像拍鬼片的。 :P

在公眾地方自我封閉,不想人騷擾但又想人知道,那個心態,我是明白的,因為我也是女人。那哭聲,其實是哭給某個人聽,希望他有足夠時間追出來,大團圓結局。只是哭過之後,還是要面對現實,到你清醒後,你就知道不能一副貞子模樣去搭地鐵。你還是要呼吸交租食飯返工見朋友。你還是有人要的。

不想因為眼淚鼻涕糊了一臉而有家歸不得,痛哭之前,請準備紙巾。

6 comments:

muddymoose said...

眼淚有quota嗎?如果要靠看電影/看書/聽歌才哭得出來,算不算麻木?

v said...

也不是的, 流淚現在變了餘興節目, 有時間才做. 另一個原因是大部分時候都會多看好的一面. 我並不喜歡沉醉在黑暗中.

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